Cowboy Poetry: Bruce Brill


The Ballad of Highpockets Bob Johnson

Chorus: [every second verse]

 

If the shoe were on the other foot, some try their best to shake it.
They’re real quick to dish it out; but, don’t know how to take it.
It’s been said what’s good for the goose should be as good for the gander,
But when High Pockets Bob fooled Cocklebur Bill, Heavy Handsome had to cool Bill's dander.

 

1. High Pockets Bob and other cowboys

Did dreary work that had to be done:

Branding & making hay

Mending fence, out all day,

So they would look for some fun.

 

2. Rodeos, drinking, dancing, singing,

Laughing at Hollywood’s cowpokes,

Riding the rails & trails

Their tongue-in-cheek tall tales.

Best of all: practical jokes.

 

3. Loosen your buddy’s saddle cinch strap

Laugh as he falls & eats some dust

’twix saddle & mount’s fur

Just slip a cocklebur

Who in the world can you trust?

 

4. A big one-eyed bruiser loved this burr prank

This was how he’d get a thrill

He was half Indian

Given name, “William”.

So was called “Cocklebur Bill.”

 

5. Cocklebur Bill one break decided

Under a loft to take repose

Each time he’d close that eye

Straw would fall from the sky

Landing on Cocklebur’s nose.

 

6. From in the loft Bill heard Bob snickering

“You SOB,” all heard Bill shout

By Cowboy lore out there

This really was a dare

So they had to have it out.

 

7. Cocklebur in both ways a puncher

Bob knew his distance must be kept

'cause Bill’s reach was longer

& Bill’s punch was stronger

So Bob had to dodge and backstep.

 

8. Bob didn’t see the peg he tripped on.

Bill pulled Bob’s slicker o’er Bob's head

Bob now was blinded,

& his arms were binded.

Bill would pound Bob ’till he’s dead.

 

9. Just then the foreman, Heavy Handsome,

Said, “Okay, Bill, end of fight.”

Do you think Bill listened?

In that eye hate glistened

Kept up with all of his might.

 

10. Ol’ Heavy Handsome lumbered forward

Then he let his huge fist fly.

Then as now, might makes right

Put quick end to the fight

One punch to Bill’s one good eye.

 

Sequel:

11. High Pockets Bob, a few years later

Rode into a road fuddler’s hatch

After some chat & chow

Sang the road fuddler how

Cocklebur Bill met his match.

 

12. In the ballad of “Cockelbur Bill's Last Fight,”

Not much of Heavy Handsome said

Though it was a cute song

Got the main detail wrong:

Made Bob the winner instead.


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You can contact Bruce at Bruceb@accentsoft.com.
Last update: May 22, 1997